Trying to see the light

Well yesterday was a rough day. Had to go find something for my MIL so went driving around (didn't find it) and decided to stop by the local lake before going home as we'd promised Abby that we'd take her. My son wasn't with us because he was behind in school work and trying to get caught up before term end. (otherwise normally he would have been) and while we were there it was fairly nice. Good day at that point and we knew the weather would be getting bad the next day. Went and took a few pics of the water which is up (a good thing since in years past has been kinda low) checked out some of the work they'd done recently. Putting slabs of cement out by the grills and they had finished the playground area. My husband took my youngest over there to check it out and she got to pet a mule that came up to the fence. She decided it was a camel and kept telling me about petting a camel. :) Could not convince her otherwise. Finally it was getting about time to get home and take my mom's meds to her so went to head home and as we did there at the stop sign looked both ways nothing so hubby went to go foreward....then there was a blazer came out of nowhere flying down the hill and I kinda went oh crap we aren't going to make it and my husband looked up and saw them and hesitated for half a second and went to go on (like it was all in slow motion) and I watch it almost reliving the wreck I went through in my Skylark...again it is like watching something in slow motion and I felt myself brace for impact and then SLAM. They had not slowed at all and there was no way for them to stop. There are no words to describe how that much impact feels. We sat there for a second totally in shock. My youngest starts screaming in a panick so hubby checked on her and she was fine just scared. There was apparently another car that had just gotten within sight and they got out and started making sure everyone was okay. Turned out the other person was someone I knew. Thankfully everyone was okay. Their vehicle seemed to just have a cracked fender but that is just visual I can't say for myself what other damage it actually had. We were facing down another direction from where we had been going. The seatbelt had caught my neck and later my leg had a swollen knot on it but not sure from what and our van has a broken axle behind the tire and damage underneath and the sliding passenger door is dented in as well ( no opening that door ever again) as the wheel itself appears dented. All in all it is totaled due to axle damage and body damage (and whatever under neath that is not accounted for) having a friend maybe look at it anyway just to double check. We wound up stranded for a short few til someone else (yet someone else I know that lived nearby) was nice enough to stop and call a wrecker for us and that got us and the van home. Going to be adding a road side assistance thing on my phone bill after this. I think it would be worth it. It appears it is going to have to be scrapped and the tow service said they buy them so maybe will just sell it to them after we clean it out. Will not get enough for another vehicle though. Will be having to figure that out. Also living where we do utility bills are high. Almost 400$ this time around. Really hope to move in a year or two at most. We'll see if that happens the way we are hoping. Anyway sore today and unhappy about no van but otherwise grateful that people were not as injured as they possibly could have been and that there were several people stopped to check instead of driving on through and for the person that called the tow service so that we were not stranded. Grateful for all the nice people who we've been around and come in contact with lately. It revives my faith in people some.  Keeping with my calorie counting and all despite the stress. On another note I got a throwing knife set for Christmas and my husband got a matching one. Going to have to set up a target. Surely that counts as exercise even if just for the arms. I tried to learn knife throwing when I was a teen.  I'd like to get a hold of a basketball goal and play that as well. Not going to happen soon though. Can't wait til warmer weather to start going on walks again. Wish we had a YMCA or something closer. I'd go. We have a little gym but I miss being near one that has a little bit of everything. Plus they have a lot of kids programs that I always thought would be great to put the kids in but driving over to the next town just wasn't a possibility as often as we'd need to do so. In any case as always lots of ideas, thoughts, and plans just hoping to even get a few of them done :)